There is a strong tendency in zen to think that only by submitting to the most austere hardships and discipline can we ever hope to attain real joy. The danger is that self hate can masquerade as spirituality. We have no essential self that can be separated from circumstance. And so we are completely subject to the vicissitudes of whatever befalls this mortal container. Practice is more about passivity than effort, immersion rather than mastery. Practice is more about letting something happen to us, rather than straining to make something occur.